Lori Carpenos & Associates

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We Are Not Who We Think We Are; We Are Limitless Potential

This blog was published in Healer’s Magazine

Whenever confounding events of blatant bigotry and racism come to my mind during a discussion or newscast, I feel it in my gut. It seems to take over my entire being. It is horrifying to witness vengeance of any kind, much less the hate filled actions we have witnessed recently.

I am left with the question: Why is it that, with all the rhetoric I've grown up with, i.e. we are all the same, we come from the same source, the color of our blood is the same, etc. etc. why do we still live in a world of bigotry and racism? It defies logic.

Racism, bigotry and inequality are not logical. There is nothing rational about hatred toward a group of people. I know that thoughts are not always logical yet we are conscious of what we think, logical or not, we can't help that - it is called the human condition, and it is what gives us an experience of life, in every moment, from birth to death. We can't help the fact that all the thoughts we have look real to us. I am referring to the thoughts that bubble up to our consciousness, not thoughts that we purposely think. So then, why would we stop to question our misinformed experience, given that it looks real and true to us?

For people who grow up around racism and bigotry and any degree of inherently hierarchical thinking that appears real, there is nothing to question. I was lucky. It so happened that my first friend in kindergarten was black. Her name was Ivy and I have fond memories of her. Our skin color difference seemed irrelevant. It was just different, to my little mind. It didn't mean anything about who she was as a person. As I write this, it occurs to me that some of my best friends throughout life have been people of color; coincidentally or not, they are among the most educated, smartest, most caring people I know. You can make what you’d like of that; to me, it means that a person’s true character has absolutely nothing to do with their race.

I’m sure that I have other biases of which I am unaware. We all have thinking that is in our blind-spot, where we don't realize it is our thinking because it appears to be reality. The current comparison of racism to COVID-19 sticks with me:

"Assume you have it, listen to the professionals, and don't spread it." It is a good idea to accept our human frailties and be humble enough to look within so we can uncover our blind-spots and be grateful when someone notices them and points them out to us.

As awful as the recent events have been, I feel some good has come of it. Collectively, we have become more aware of the underbelly of society. Hatred, bigotry, racism and bias are so much more prevalent than I’ve heretofore observed or realized.. Perhaps this means that humanity is finally ready to really, address what is in their blind spots—is the Black life the new gay marriage? Is the next major breakthrough in American civil rights upon us?

Another question comes to mind: what makes it possible for one person to empathize with another, whether that person is being mistreated, or is mistreating others?

How can we further understand how our biases develop, and how the human mind develops these blind-spots?

I feel that it is valuable to have an in-depth understanding of the role that personal thought has on our experience of life. In addition to providing a solid foundation for any program on bias, it would serve to further enhance the application of that program. It would also help people look more deeply at their own biases and alleviate judgement of others’, before attempting to change their mind. Minds change naturally for people who truly understand how it works. The video link at the end of the next paragraph is an example of how that happens, from the inside-out - i.e., change comes from within.

The fact that anyone can join doesn’t detract from how fortunate I feel to be a member of a global non-profit called 3PGC. The purpose of this organization is to share an understanding of mind, thought and consciousness; three principles that help people live their best life in an ever evolving manner, and take affirmative action to continually wake up and become more conscious of their blind-spots. Sitting in a conference sponsored by this organization, I heard from an ex-prisoner who had thought he was a "career criminal" that he had no choice in life but to use people for what he could get from them. He assumed that was who he was, period. While in prison he learned that he is not what he thinks and he woke up to the fact that he has unlimited potential. His perception of life and people changed so much that he now sees how to help people rather than take from them. He is employed by the same organization that helped him see life so differently, with fresh eyes. Never in his wildest dreams would he have thought he'd be speaking in front of 1,000 people at a world-wide conference and receive a standing ovation. His name is Dave and you can see an interview with him on Insightful Conversations..

Another organization, One Solution, is helping wake people up to their misguided thinking. The place to start is within each one of us. Assume you have it, look within, and question your assumptions.

Also, of interest: What is the impact of racism on mental health?

If you would like to learn more about the workings of the three principles of: consciousness, thought and mind, please contact me here.